kaffyr: Umbrella's, figure rise in a field; from Magritte? (umbrellas rise)
[personal profile] kaffyr
Waiting in Toronto

I'm headed back to Nova Scotia for a week to see my Mom (it's funny; sometimes I think of her as my Mum and sometimes I think of her as Mom. I grew up calling her Mummy, then Mum, and when I moved to the States, the "u" elongated in my mouth and my mind.)

I know I've said this before, and I will be elated if fate once again proves me and the Doctors and everyone else wrong, because that has happened, but I believe this will be the last time I see her alive. I am going to make the absolute best of it, and make it as good a visit with her as I possibly can.

She never left hospital after going in in April, although they now allow her out for day trips and such (very weird to have a medical "day trip", but it's a small Nova Scotia hospital, and the care is, in some ways, very very personal.) The reasons she never left are legion, but topping the list are returning cancer (now back in the abdomen and the spine), and continued confusion that prevents her from caring for herself completely.

My step-dad is tied up in knots because he thinks he can care for her, and is determinedly ignoring the fact that he's 87, partly blind and deaf, and ... well, he's amazing for his age, but no, he can't take care of her. It's tearing him apart because he misses her, and he knows that she's dying. He wants her to die at home. That's not going to happen.

BUT ... but, they are letting her come home for one night, maybe two, while I'm there, because they feel I can handle anything that might come up. (cue internal thoughts of "Jesus God on a Goddamned Crutch are they Crazy?", but I am taking a cue from Step-dad Rob and determinedly ignoring those thoughts.) I think this will make everyone involved much happier - or at least it has the potential to do so.

So that's good, neh?

I have decided that I will try to take some pictures around Wolfville, and maybe some of my brother and my Mom. If any of them are good, I may upload them so you can see the people I've been talking about. And maybe there will be other neat things to talk about.
And I still have to talk about the New Doctor and the Departing Doctor.

Other thoughts: Getting up at 4 a.m. for a 6:10 a.m. boarding time was rough, especially since I didn't sleep much the night before. At least Porter gave me a free breakfast. They really are the tops in airlines, at least in my books. Pity they don't fly more places.

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